No two ways about it. I’m sick and dispirited. And here is why.

ALERT: This post contains material some people might find distressing!!!

After a awful days travelling yesterday on a “Tour Bus”(against my better judgement,) I woke after a fitful sleep only to feel odd and like I had no energy still. Sharp pains ensued then I ran over to unceremoniously open my bowels in the loo. Over the next hour liquid ran from me and, as my grand finale, I puked into the hand basin that was right next to my head in the tiny shower room. I also had a fever.

Tour bus from hell

Whimpering, I crawled over the floor back to my bed to lie down and wait for the next onslaught. When properly poisoned, as I’m sure many of you know, this can go on long after your total body weight is spent. It’s a mystery where it all comes from. I did feel a little better after the vomit but knew my bowels hadn’t finished with me. This bacteria was no doubt picked up on one of the filthy bus rests chosen by the tour bus company. The stress of the journey had no doubt weakened me as I never have had such an alarming food poisoning and fever. I am normally a tough old bird.

After cheap bus ride the puke and near death miserable room.

All this leads to, to bus or not to bus?

I did a couple of very successful and cheap bus rides in Peru and was very happy with them, super comfy very cheap and easy to organise. A really good alternative to flying and renting cars. A lot of them have a choice of reclining seat or a complete 180 bed as they call it, and very fine they are too. Erratic WiFi and food are also sometimes available like being on a plane.

fully reclining “bed” on Peruvian bus.

Guatemala however is a different animal. A friend came over from Mexico and we decided to travel a bit in the notoriously more dangerous Guatemala. I organised the bus with Guatego, a super agency that is immaculate in its follow up service. If you have any questions however ludicrous, they promptly respond and patiently reply. The bus from Guatemala City to Coban was really comfortable and, although not as good as the Peruvian ones, still excellent for the price. Then the little van was still ok from Coban to Lanquin where you get a 4×4 organised by the hotel for a 45 minute bone rattling drive in the dark to the hotel. After the climb for the view there and the swim in the fabulous pools you’re kinda done. There’s nothing more to do.

Surprisingly tasty food in Peru

So I managed to get some WiFi and emailed my lovely lady at Guatego. She could fix me up with the trip to Flores for 35 dollars, the hotel however had a bus for 14 dollars. My friend said lets save the money and use the hotels own tour bus.

Good old London bus.

Herein lies the problem of not travelling solo in a nutshell. I caved to someone elses wishes and didn’t stay with my lovely lady thus committing myself to 10 hours of hell.

I would NEVER have done this if alone.

It works for some people but not me.

Downloaded TV show!

The passengers were mostly a group of very aggressive and hostile Israelis. They were so unfriendly that I was literally gobsmacked, no camaraderie that you usually get on rather,shall we say, difficult journeys and they squashed anyone not in their group so we were all left sullen and silent. The bus itself was tiny and overloaded with fold down seats in the middle so was, as far as I’m concerned, a death trap, and I was at the back. Claustrophobic and terribly trapped at the back of this ghastly vehicle I suffered 10 hours and was wrecked when we finally arrived. The next day I was terribly sick as explained above.

I am the Bus Bandit and am banning all cheapo Central American Bus Tours full of super rude Israeli gangs

So, my friends the answer is this. NEVER TRAVEL ON THE CHEAPER VERSIONS OF THIS MODE OF TRANSPORT! Always get a decent coach with a reputable company, for us old birds it’s simply a terribly stressful way of making any trip especially the longer journeys. Sometimes it’s difficult to do this if you paint yourself into a corner with more tricky destinations, but with canny planning you don’t have to suffer in this way, and as I’ve said before it’s really stupid to go through this and get sick which could ruin your trip and send you home. I mentioned POOT in a previous blog to help you old girls out and now by this error I feel I must warn you of this.

Outside a bus station. Not surprising I was so sick!

Last word. I just spoke to the lovely owner of a Hotel in Belizes’ Caye Caulker and he reiterated the problems they universally have there with the young Israelis who, having left their Military Service and going on a kind of gap year, seem to morph into elitist groups who bully and exclude the rest of the tourists. They are giving the normally lovely Israelis a bad name which is really a shame and in no way am I trying to give all Israelis a slur but maybe these young people need travelling etiquette lessons.


Please remember to follow and share your thoughts!




Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s