OR A RUFFLED AND BEDRAGGLED OLD BIRD MAKES IT!!!
I can’t even tell you how wonderful it is to be here after the trauma of the trials and tribulations of travelling at the moment. Firstly for the people I met en route and you old birds I can be contacted at REBECCA@RTPOTS.COM. I will be adding to this later today.
OR GETTING TO GRIPS WITH ANOTHER CULTURE, THE OLMECS.
At cocktails the tasty food in little bite-size pieces were delicious, much as the bite-size pieces that the cannibal fish had nibbled off me, probably had been to him too.
Top Tip: Research Airport hotels very carefully. I have made catastrophic mistakes in the past
OR I FINALLY MADE IT TO THE LONGEST GRAVEYARD IN THE WORLD!
Stirring from my uneasy sleep in my hovel I immediately started fretting about my MSS (Ministry of State Security, their Secret Service) ‘guide’ (I know you’re all snickering behind your hands about me being paranoid but I’m pretty sure I’m right) I dressed and had their hideous offering of breakfast then waited for her to turn up. She was late and I started freaking, because that’s what you do there, panic and be suspicious, but she showed up and when I asked to see her certificate she went shady. We went off and I had a strong feeling I was being abducted not going on a tour of the Great Wall. She started going onto this weird state sanctioned rant. She suddenly didn’t speak English when I asked her questions. She refused to go off piste with my wanting to talk about alternative subjects. Yes I know that she too could be scared but my story is better.
TOP TIP: My habit of always putting “old town or historic centre” had bitten me in the arse a few times. This terminology, “Historic centre”, includes and means a place where you will be raped and murdered in an alley and have everything stolen off your still warm corpse, but it also has a lovely church.
OR HOW I STAGGERED ON FOR ANOTHER INSANE MONTH ON A BROKEN FOOT AND MASHED ANKLE.
ALERT: there is a lot of shouty sweary bits in this post so not for people who disapprove of foul language and indeed a potty mouth to end all potty mouths.
So, my friends the answer is this. NEVER TRAVEL ON THE CHEAPER VERSIONS OF THIS MODE OF TRANSPORT!
