Now I’m feeling all energetic after Dreadful December I am looking to travel again.

I vomited and shat my way through a month while everyone else was out partying and Finally found out the cause, an allergy to one of my health supplements! I lost ten kilos and all muscle tone. Emaciated and wretched I certainly had a big year ahead to start fresh.

So January I have been without alcohol and cigarettes (I do it for at least forty days each year) and have returned to my daily yoga in my living room via YouTube, and am delving further into Qigong and meditation. Only eleven days but my god the difference is amazing. Although very thin my muscles are starting to react to my efforts and my breathing has gone back to normal. I am eating moderately but very healthily and I go to the library all the time as I’m reading voraciously again both fiction and self-help literature.

A borrowed scarf from the Blue Mosque in Istanbul

This Sunday I go back over to Turkiye and hopefully seal the deal on my derelict hovel and its land, allowing me to grow organic veg and make my artwork. So this got me thinking about travelling clothes. The only part of my body that won’t have shrunk is my head so I will purchase a special hat for my new life of health and happiness. I will be searching for my pleasant peasant hat and I would like some pointers if possible from other old birds?


I’ve always been partial to a decent bit of headwear but I have quite a large head for a woman, I presume it is because I am hugely intelligent but some say it’s because I am an alien, or Neanderthal, or both. I say they are just jealous but it does make for tricky shopping, and basically impossible online.

The tragically comical errors I have made are countless but I persevere. Mrs Bighead will not be defeated

I bought this on Amazon for Russia. Oh dear so small for my big head no wonder it was such a bargain! The model obviously had a thin alien head.

A much more glam version worn in nippy Budapest.
RUSSIA and my very successful and comfy ushanka. This was so good my head felt warm even with -40 wind chill factor in Siberia
Mooching hat good for apres ski or just hanging out after a long day’s adventure. It’s comforting!

These hot hats for hotheads won’t really be relevant in my new domain and anyway I have plenty of spare ones for next week should it turn nippy. What I really need is a practical hat for hiking in those beautiful mountains and gardening. I want one more romantic straw hat for drinking cocktails on my slate terrace (for it will be slate of that I am sure) and one practical. I might just buy one plain cap and paint it to have a mad artist one too, what do you reckon?

That means I’m shopping for three unless I modify an old one for my artist hat to experiment with, I do love a good experiment. This has sometimes been to my detriment even positively dangerous but I do like to do things my way and see what happens. Anyhoo on with the hats.

U.K. Combos like this have been known to help when you’re ill-prepared for a wet windy environment such as Jurassic Coast. My dignity in tatters but a little extra warmth was to be had.
Brutal and menacing? No just was covering my mouth and nose for when I went down to take pics in Chinatown the other night!


When I say cool, I don’t me I look cool, clearly however, this elephant thought I was a fool. While putting me in his gentle stranglehold I heard people laughing. Really how silly people are he was just suggesting something in elephant language.

THAILAND. The elephant wanted this hat but did he need to strangle me for it?

Headwear definitely portrays personality. Looking back over the years I see that I’ve never owned a flowery hat and most of my friends don’t do that kind of hat either. I would love to but I just look silly. The same goes for frilly fascinators and suchlike, I just look like someone out of the loony bin has stolen a hat from a proper lady! I can’t wear tight fitting either. I have a round face and a bobble hat will just make me look like a balloon head.

Indeed it would seem there is a whole science waiting to be explored in hat psychology, do please tell me if there is?

INDIA. Doing a princess Di is OK but not the same in an old cap. However, it was needed in the burning sun.
If you are going on a boat it’s always a good idea to suck up to the Captain
MACHU PICCHU PERU. My iconic cap and bag that says ” I don’t know where I’m going but I’m on my way”
MEXICO Rain and shine this cap survived my whole south and central American trip.
BORNEO. Survived the “yellow trail” in the Bako National Park jungle trek. the rock is clearly taking the piss in the background.


This is another consideration. I will be in a Muslim area so will need at least one more elegant headscarf that is beautiful and not resort to my shorts or Tshirt or other items of clothing, I won’t be at the beach in Mexico for gods sake!

SICILY. In this desert valley of the temples, I was ready for the sudden shocking heat
TURKEY An improvised head covering. A shirt used to save my bonce and sacrifice my shoulders

Try as I may I can’t find my pics with my head covered to go into mosques and some churches. I must have them in a file somewhere!! Someone should send in one of theirs!

Pirate kerchief

Oh well, I’m off to a new meditation class at the Mayfair library so maybe I will get some divine inspiration and drag around in this foul weather to see if the shops are carrying some summer stuff that might uplift both big bonce and round face!

THAILAND. Hat provided for going into organic garden to pick some veg and herbs in Chiang Mai

Top Tip: All hats are good hats, but most won’t travel well and frankly who can be bothered carrying one around that you can’t chuck in your case? The picture above (bottom right) shows what happens to an expensive hat in my hands. Anything I can’t squidge mercilessly, carry sea urchins in and use as a “safe” (Money and camera and any valuables wrapped in it and covered in a hole with sand) is of little use to me. This is why I normally am in caps. They don’t fly away and are small and eminently tough. You can wet them to cool your head too. A straw hat would certainly not do the job old chap!

WHERE NEXT? Hat bought in Russia to wear in the map room!!!
Worn at Canne Film Festival many years back. The outfit was bought in St. Petersburg 30 years ago
Off for a new adventure!

I’ll add to this when I get back to update you on my expedition, meanwhile, if you have any inspiration do share!